The choice of too much
By Alex Fayle

  • Someday Lesson: It’s OK to choose to ignore all the ‘right’ advice and do what we want to anyway.

Ever had too many good ideas and you don’t know which to choose? Of course you have. It’s an epidemic.

I’m overloaded with them right now. You see, over the last year or so, I’ve been putting out feelers for writing ideas: fiction, non-fiction, magazines, and of course this blog. Plus I have my English teaching and upcoming mentoring services (in development). And then this month, WHAM! it all came together at once.

  • I got hired to write for an online magazine
  • I got hired to write a small business manual
  • My teaching hours got upped
  • I regained my interest in fiction writing
  • I started the Someday News newsletter and
  • I got hit with just the most fantastic anti-procrastination mentoring idea.

Oh, and somewhere in that all I fit in Raul, friends (real and virtual), fitness, making connections, downtime (because if I don’t take downtime I’m a disaster), and worry for my mother who spent two weeks in the hospital with pneumonia (she’s home again where the cats can take good care of her).

If I were mentoring myself, I’d say that it was time to drop something, but I realized this morning that I have no intention of doing so. The business manual contract wraps up in May, I’ve figured out how to move my fiction forward bit by bit (thanks Brett!) and for the fantastic anti-procrastination mentoring idea, I’m going for outside help to launch it.

My only question is: because I’ve chosen to by hyper-busy, does that mean I don’t have the right to kvetch about it?

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Comments

21 Responses to “The choice of too much”

  1. Melodee Patterson on January 30th, 2009 6:47 pm

    Yes, you don’t have…or is it, No, you don’t have the right to kvetch about it.

    And why should you? I think being too busy is always better than not being busy enough. Boredom is the worst!

    So enjoy!

    Melodee Patterson´s last blog post..Be a Better Virtual Assistant by Exercising

  2. Andy Hayes on January 30th, 2009 7:08 pm

    Only Alex knows what’s best for Alex. From my perspective, it sounds bloody brilliant and I’m quite sure you’ll work out a plan nicely. Yes, that’s right - a plan. Planning makes it all come together. I’m working on mine right now.

    Congrats on your dreams slowly coming true :)
    Andy Hayes´s last blog post..Tour France with Julia Child

  3. Jessica @ThriveYourTribe on January 30th, 2009 7:14 pm

    I wonder if it’s not the difference in intentionally choosing to take on a lot because it excites you and feeling like you have to add things to your list because they’re “smart” or “what people in this situation do.” It seems like it’s a lot easier to feel overwhelmed when a list is full of those things you should be doing than it is when the list overflows with what you want to be doing. That said, I think it’s totally natural to take a look at a huge list of stuff (even when it’s all stuff you absolutely want on your list) and think: What was I thinking?!

    Jessica @ThriveYourTribe´s last blog post..Have You Been Led to Believe These Loathsome Publishing Lies?

  4. Marelisa on January 30th, 2009 10:07 pm

    Hi Alex: When it rains it pours :-) You can kvetch about it, as long as you’re simultaneously doing the necessary wok to get to where you want to go.

    Marelisa´s last blog post..5 Imaginative Ways to Generate Ideas

  5. Brett Legree on January 31st, 2009 2:26 am

    Go Alex!!!

    Keep on going, stay busy, stay focused. You’re doing stuff you love, so that’s the best thing about it.

    Keep busy. As the old saying went, “the devil makes work for idle hands”.

    (Oh, and glad to have been of assistance!)

    Brett Legree´s last blog post..viking fridays - turn the spell.

  6. James | Dancing Geek on January 31st, 2009 3:25 am

    Wahey! Glad to hear you’ve got so many options. And yes, I give you 100% permission to whinge, moan, whine, gripe and kvetch as much as you want, ignore the others.

    It’s great to have lots of stuff going on that keeps you excited. Just protect that downtime, that must not be crept into at all. A tired Alex is not just grumpy but all kinds of bad. We want a happy Alex, please.

    James | Dancing Geek´s last blog post..Another conversation, this time with a crab

  7. J.D. Meier on January 31st, 2009 5:39 am

    It sounds like you’re nailing stuff and passion is helping you keep things together.

    That’s great to see.

    J.D. Meier´s last blog post..Avoid Mental Burnout

  8. James Chartrand - Men with Pens on January 31st, 2009 1:01 pm

    *gives Alex a skeptical look…*

    You’re not becoming me, are you?

    James Chartrand - Men with Pens´s last blog post..Teaching People What They Never Learned in University

  9. Kelly on January 31st, 2009 1:53 pm

    Alex,

    I’m with Jessica. I think it’s how you got to this busybusy point that makes the difference.

    And also, you can see the light at the end of some of the tunnels from where you stand. That makes the temporary pain much easier to bear.

    I’m a big fan of kvetching. (Yours and mine!) Go right ahead. I’ll sit over here and learn something from it.

    Regards,

    Kelly

    Kelly´s last blog post..Inspiration Points: Reality Is Not on a TV Show

  10. Janet Barclay on January 31st, 2009 3:41 pm

    The church up the street from me once put this quote on their sign out front:

    “When opportunity comes knocking, don’t complain about the noise.”

    I haven’t been able to find out where it came from, but I love it! However, it’s human nature to complain, so kvetch if you want to, just not too loudly! :)
    Janet Barclay´s last blog post..So many blogs, so little time!

  11. steph on January 31st, 2009 4:14 pm

    Nope, you can’t whine! Instead, toast yourself for your success, which is what you’ve been working hard for in the first place, and get down to prioritizing and planning how you are going to do it, because it can be done.

    You can’t whine because you wanted this in the first place: you made it happen. The moment you whine is the moment you say you don’t actually want it all.

    Does that sound too harsh? I just mean, you can do it - it is possible, even though it doesn’t seem it is. All you have to do is break it down into manageable chunks to put it in perspective. And see if there are deadlines that you can extend. You’re an organizer, dammit! :)
    PS. I’m fully aware that I’ve written about having pity parties myself. But I’m learning to overcome that - from you!!

    steph´s last blog post..I Am All I’ve Done

  12. Kelly on January 31st, 2009 4:20 pm

    LOL, counting the votes for and against kvetching here. The tides are slightly in favor right now (this would have made a good poll, eh?).

    Until later,

    Kelly

    Kelly´s last blog post..Tip of the Week: Pump Down the Volume…

  13. Wendi Kelly- Life's little Inspirations on January 31st, 2009 9:19 pm

    Here is the thing…You have to stay aware. To be in denial and say you are always going to have the stiff upper lip is a great strategy for burn out.

    So…no pity party exactly, but you need to moniter what your body signals are telling you. And if you notice that you are FEELING like whining, then you need to take a step back and strategically ask yourself why. Better boundaries, need more sleep, less drinking, more water, more fresh air, …a simple shift in the time of day that you are doing things…it could be a hundred different things, and it doesn’t hurt to get a fresh pair of eyes that you trust to help you take a look. But don’t ignore it. The need to whine is there for a reason.

    Wendi Kelly- Life’s little Inspirations´s last blog post..Field Trip

  14. Ulla Hennig on February 1st, 2009 12:23 pm

    Alex,
    those projects sound wonderful and I’ve got the impression that you will enjoy them. Just listen to the signals of your body, they will tell you when it is too much. And in my humble opinion a little bit of kvetching is okay!

    Ulla Hennig´s last blog post..The Lord of the Dance

  15. Evita on February 1st, 2009 5:14 pm

    Hi Alex

    That is an interesting question. My first reaction would be that we have the right to do anything we want to experience (relatively speaking), every moment we have the opportunity to declare ourselves in any way we see fit.

    However I always like to look at the deeper questions. And in this case some questions I would ask myself would be:
    Why did I decide to take on so much?
    What is my purpose of all of this?
    How does it serve me to “complain/kvetch, etc.” about it?
    And so on….

    I think when we look deeper into things like this, we realize that there is something else we are trying to express or suppress, and often getting “super busy” is our way of dealing with it.

    Please don’t get me wrong I am not trying to over-analyze you or anything, just speaking from direct and indirect experience, and if it is able to help in any way, I love to extend that to someone else :)
    Evita´s last blog post..Movie Review: Wheel of Life

  16. Patricia - Spiritual Journey Of A Lightworker on February 1st, 2009 7:30 pm

    Alex, I came here from your class at Blogging Without a Blog. Great class and comment section. I appreciate the information since I am still building my blog numbers.

    I agree with Jessica’s comment. Whining is ok in small amounts. It lets off stream that may be building inside. Excitement is great too. There is a very fine line between doing everything you love and getting into burnout. Your body and mental outlook can tell you the difference. You are the only one who can tell the difference for you.

    For me, having quiet, alone time is very important, especially when I am in a growth spurt where everything is moving forward at a very rapid pace. If I don’t allow for that quiet time, I lose my sense of inner balance.

    Like James - Dancing Geek - said it, I become mean if I don’t get my down time. I think most of us are that way when we don’t take care of our needs before others.

    Now, I am off to do some more reading. I see some new names of people and blogs here that I haven’t met yet. Have a glorious day whatever you decide to do. The ultimate decision is yours and yours alone. You knew that.

    Patricia - Spiritual Journey Of A Lightworker´s last blog post..Fear Is My Friend

  17. Ricardo Bueno on February 2nd, 2009 3:14 am

    Hey Alex,

    Isn’t it awesome when things just kinda seem to fall in together!? Congrats on all the productivity!

    Ricardo Bueno´s last blog post..Answer the Phone!

  18. Barbara Swafford on February 2nd, 2009 8:08 am

    Hi Alex - Your plate is full, but yet you’re managing to handle it. Kudos to you for that. It sounds like some of your “somedays” have arrived. Enjoy the moments and the journey.

    Barbara Swafford´s last blog post..SEO - Are We Getting It All Wrong

  19. Alex Fayle on February 2nd, 2009 6:03 pm

    Wow, quite the discussion going on here. It looks like it’s still about half and half for the kvetching… How about I do one big kvetch tomorrow and then I’ll shut up?

    @Melodee
    When I get bored I start getting dramatic - it’s not a good thing.

    @Andy
    I love that phrase “bloody brilliant” - it makes me think of Ron Weasley. And good luck on your own dreams! Bit by bit they come true as long as we keep working at them.

    @Jessica
    I was feeling overwhelmed until I realized that I’d asked for every single one of the things on my plate and suddenly the overwhelmedness disappeared.

    @Marelisa
    Yes, so often kvetching is a form of procrastination, isn’t it?

    @Brett
    You said busy several times which always reminds me of the Evil Magician in the cartoon Frosty Xmas special. At the end he dashes off saying “Bu-sy, bu-sy, bu-sy!” Always makes me giggle.

    @James DG
    You’re only giving me permission to complain because you want the same. Well, okay - you have it. You too are welcome to kvetch, moan, whine, and even get all dramatic about it.

    @JD
    Success and passion create an awesome energy and procrastination breaker…

    @James C
    No way! Most of these projects have an end. And I take my downtime for sure (for example this morning I stayed in bed and watched Battlestar Galactica until 8:30am and then at 12:30 I went out for a run).

    @Kelly
    The thing that keeps me energized is knowing that it’s temporary. If I couldn’t see a light at the end of the tunnel (or found out that the light was an oncoming train), then I’d be seriously rethinking my choices.

    @Janet
    What an awesome quote! I have to remember that.

    @Steph
    No, not at all too harsh - just a gentle butt-kicking which is always appreciated.

    @Wendi
    YES!!! Awareness is the key. The moment I go on autopilot I lose my vision and things just get way too messy.

    @Ulla
    Yes, I am enjoying the projects and learning lots from each one of them, even how to kvetch quietly. ;)

    @Evita
    Those are great questions. I’m going to have to come back to this post if the kvetching rises about a minor grumble.

    @Patricia
    I’m glad you enjoy the BWAB post. I learned a lot researching it. Quiet time is so important to me. When we have guests, I need to take some time to myself, or I get really cranky. And when I work too much, I don’t sleep well and that starts a cycle of irritability that no one wants to be around.

    @Ricardo
    Thanks! Piece by piece I’m finishing the full puzzle. It’ll be exciting to see what picture I end up with.

    @Barbara
    Yes indeed, I’m working hard to make someday today, even when my procrastinating ways say “do it laaater.” ;)

  20. Laurel Vespi on February 2nd, 2009 9:50 pm

    here’s my take…
    go ahead and kvetch or vent or rant - whatever suits you best
    just don’t do it for any longer than 5 minutes
    after that it becomes a whine and that’s never pretty
    and… being in choice about what you invite into your life also means being in choice about how you handle it
    have fun and congrats on the unfolding success

  21. Alex Fayle on February 3rd, 2009 7:40 am

    @Laurel
    I always put limits on my kvetching. 5 minutes sounds good. When I’m in a full-on wallow, I give myself the limit of one depressing CD (something atmospheric and gothic).

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