Last week Brett mentioned that he acknowledged that there is a slim chance that he might not make the move to New Zealand – and this upset some of the readers. I get what he said – he meant that plans aren’t written in stone and we need to be at least slightly open to big and small shifts in our plans.
In my post, A Roudabout Way Home from September 2006, I experienced that in a small way – a supposedly simple trip home became an adventure. We knew what we wanted to do, but how we did it was suddenly up in the air, but because we were clear on what we wanted, things worked out in the end even if we had to be flexible about the plans to get it done.
Here are this week’s questions for the Lab-Rats (and anyone else who wants to participate in the comments or on their own blog).
![](http://somedaysyndrome.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/stress-no-300x225.jpg "\\"Stress? What stress?\\" (Cuddles by kaibara87 on flickr.com)")
All four Lab-Rats felt they were good prioritizing under pressure in work situations (and in the Urbane Lion’s situation, he literally was a pressure cooker being a chef). The Urbane Lion admitted to laziness and said that sometimes he needs a little pressure applied to a situation before he manages to rouse himself to action – but once he starts, off he goes! Knowing how much of a planner and lover of calm the Urban Panther is, I wonder how you two deal with this enjoyment of pressure on your part, Lion. Maybe we’ll see a dual post on this topic soon?
Brett’s answer to the first question expressed my attitude towards changes: “there isn’t much I can’t handle as long as the sun comes up tomorrow, and I am still alive.” I call this the Mack Truck scenario: what would happen if you got hit by a Mack Truck tomorrow – would the world end? For you, yes it would. But for everyone else they’d adapt and move on.
It’s not surprising that I have a bunch of take-charge people here in this round of Lab-Rats, after all they did step forward and volunteer to expose their lives to the world at large. So when small things changes in plans happen, they tend to act, making quick plans and implementing them, or deciding to toss the plans out the window and enjoy the moment.
Sal and Crista added that emotional situations threw them off however, making prioritizing more difficult. Crista wrote:
Sometimes a negative reaction in the small situations can cause me to ‘awfulize’ what’s happening in the bigger picture and I lose sight of the small wins I’ve made along the way.
Adding emotion (and too little sleep or too much wine) to a situation takes away Crista’s ability to act and she ends up reacting. Thanks to her awareness of her Emotional Intelligence, however, Crista can usually avoid getting into a worked up state. However, with three young kids and a three-week trip across the country without them, the emotions are kind of hard to avoid. But I’ll let Crista tell you about that herself tomorrow.
Sal expressed the biggest difficulty bringing his ability to prioritize little things to coping with changes on a big scale, probably because the big things in his life are all tied to intense emotions, like desire and fear (concerning his writing mainly). He’s realized however, that if he looks at everything like a work or school project and applies a deadline to it, he removes some of the emotion from the situation and can act rather than react.
Brett’s relaxed attitude to changes in plans means he’s willing to entertain any possibility while still pursuing his dreams (which means, yes folks, he has no intention of ever giving up the New Zealand move).
Again, I feel Brett’s attitude best sums up a healthy attitude to dealing with changes in plans:
…as long as my family and I are happy, safe and healthy, we can adapt.
Someday Lessons:
13 Responses to “Practicing Flexibility to Remain Steady”
Leave a Reply
Please join in the conversation and leave a comment - I’d love to hear from you!
var gaJsHost = (("https:" == document.location.protocol) ? "https://ssl." : "http://www.");
document.write(unescape("%3Cscript src='" + gaJsHost + "google-analytics.com/ga.js' type='text/javascript'%3E%3C/script%3E"));
My biggest shortcomings is not planning enough. Things have gotten busier than expected and I haven’t had time to plan as much as I usually do. That being said, I am comfortable to deviate from the plan if the situation calls for it, but I don’t like not having a plan to begin with.
As they say, “Failure to plan is planning to fail,” even though most plans need to change due to unforeseen events.
Alex: the 7 P’s summs this all up. Prior Propper Planning Prevents Piss Poor Performance. Hey, maybe that is what the Al at 7P is all about? Who knows.
Sal’s last blog post..What do you know?
RE: Knowing how much of a planner and lover of calm the Urban Panther is, I wonder how you two deal with this enjoyment of pressure on your part, Lion. Maybe we’ll see a dual post on this topic soon?
Well, funny you should mention that. Since the Lion’s assignment, we have had two discussions about this very thing. So, duelling blogs on this appearing tomorrow.
Urban Panther’s last blog post..They are my Boyz and I love them
Another excellent post and topic! I love getting to know everyone better through their answers, and reading how honest people are, and their revelations about themselves. This is quite relevant for me, too…I’ll answer these questions soon. I have to prioritize!
(I think I might be the deviant in your group, for the most part…)
steph’s last blog post..Letting Go
I am a goal setter and planner. I look down the road to the big picture much more then the little picture. I’m not very happy about being put in a pressure cooker situation and those folks who put me in a situation (by not getting around to things until the last minute… will likely get my dander up.) But..on the other hand..life happens…and when it does, I tend to be the one who just quickly throws everthing in high gear starts handing out the instructions and puts things to order. I don’t like it when things are out of control. (read: recovering control freak)
As long as I have had enough sleep ( my nemisis) its fine. A migraine or lack of sleep…and well..we don’t want to go there. ( I’m getting much better. Understanding the issues is the first step in recovery
Wendi Kelly’s last blog post..Changing Colors
I like what Sal said about approaching things like a school project, because it removes the emotion.
I’ve used this tactic lately, even when I’m writing something emotional. It helps me dot the i’s and cross the t’s.
Writer Dad’s last blog post..Wiped Out and Ready For More
@WD: The only issue that I have found with school projects is that, if they are big enough, by the end you are actually dotting your t’s and crossing your i’s (sometimes literally).
But then again, you are getting it finished, so that is a plus.
Sal’s last blog post..What do you know?
I like the occasional boost from pressure, it gives you that adrenaline buzz and it’s an excuse to run around being really active without people telling you off for being enthusiastic. But pressure and stress can all too easily slip past that and into a grinding, slowing force that becomes an extra weight to bear.
I agree with Wendi about other people’s lack of planning putting pressure on you - this is often the case (be it colleagues, bosses or friends & family) rather than an genuinely unforeseen circumstance causing the pressure (where all can rise to the occasion and bond as a team). The former is so negative because you feel like you are having to carry the other person - the latter (if it doesn’t happen so often that you wonder if anyone really has a clue what’s going on) gives you all an excuse to band together and have fun and can be a really positive experience.
James | Dancing Geek’s last blog post..The Lazy People series
Hi Alex - I’m glad Brett’s not giving up on his New Zealand dream.
I understand where Sal’s coming from. When there’s some sort of emotional attachment, whether positive or negative, I often find it difficult to deal with projects too.
I’m not sure what to write for this as I am a bit of this and a bit of that. I have always found I work best in pressure cooker situations. I often struggle to start projects, but a deadline always gets me motivated and feeling empowered. And the high when you meet the deadline is amazing. But since i had my son 4 years ago, I don’t like a lot of pressure now. I find motherhood stressful and high pressure in itself so adding more to that is not ideal unless it also involves activities which inspire me and give me a buzz.
I love change though. I backpacked for months at a time, changed careers, and moved a lot in my life and so change is actually what I seek. I need to always feel like I’m growing and learning so changing plans is a part of life for me. Now that I own a house in a nice town and have all this stability I find myself bored to tears. Maybe I like change too much…
Kelly
Kelly@SHE-POWER’s last blog post..SHE-POWER Women: Monika Mundell is the Writing Chef
@Kelly - Your last paragraph speaks to me. I’ve often wondered that myself - do I like change too much? Thank you for sharing.
@Al
Planning is a challenge, isn’t it? In business I tend to overplan and not do. In life I tend to jump in and then realize, oh, that shelf won’t fit on this wall and I’ve already drilled five holes. Oops.
@Sal
Great list! Al’s 7Ps are: Passion, Purpose, Planning, Pursuit, Progress, Power and Peace. I think it’s an awesome list and feel a post brewing relating the cure to Someday Syndrome to those 7Ps.
@UP
So glad I could provide you with post fodder! BTW I enjoyed that post a lot, but I notice that the UL went instead for a different theme.
@Steph
It is great fun getting to know the Lab-Rats better, eh? And as I get to know them better, I get to know myself better. (Being a deviant is good. I like deviants)
@Wendi
“I don’t like it when things are out of control.” Me neither. I used to and had quite a drug-filled youth, but now won’t touch the stuff because the lack of control that comes with them.
@WD
Yes, a bit of distance with the emotional stuff keeps the writing from getting too mushy. And keeps you in control of the story (instead of the other way around).
@James
I agree. When the self-created pressure only affects yourself that’s fine, but when it has an impact on others, then it’s time to reexamine what you’re doing.
@Cath
I’m super emotional (see today’s post) and have a hard time using my common sense when strong emotions are involved.
@Kelly
I’m totally a bit of this, a bit of that - depending on the situation, my mood, the mood or personality of the other people involved.
@Crista
I’m a total change junkie too. Too much stability has me creating drama in a very unhealthy drama queen way.
[...] plans things out, but then needs a fire under his butt to get going. Alex, on this week’s lab rat post, challenged the Lion and I with the [...]